Things I learned that Coach White learned from Bobby Hull and Bobby Orr
Lessons on surviving the public eye.
The culture of a team is passed from veteran to rookie. It is one of the last places where ritual lives in our modern society, as we increasingly are fed the myth that we don’t need each other. When systems of ritual break down, then a shared sense of collective more also tends to evaporate. Or, worse, linger — as a dormant, lifeless thing we continue to worship out of habit.
Participating in team sports, however, still demands us to have some kind of collective something; even when it looks like everything else we share has broken down or become polarized, weaponized, or just radioactive.
Yes, there are many negative examples of toxic sports culture in our news these days - first among them originating from my alma mater, Northwestern. But instead of adding more to that list, I would like to take the time this week to share how I learned to survive being thrust into public life as a child star from a hockey coach, named Jack White, who learned his lessons from Bobby Orr and Bobby Hull.
We were posing for pictures in the lobby of Hennepin Ice Arena; the site of the soon-to-be debacle against the Hawks and just about every other team in Minneapolis before we became the Mighty Ducls. Miraculously, after some dress up from art direction, the same ice arena hosted the Junior Goodwill Games a year later during Ducks 2. But for now, it was just the place we went to school and learned to somehow be bad at hockey.
A lot of the staff wanted to grab a picture with us actor kids and Jack White grabbed one of the kids who stunt doubled for us and invited him into the picture. He then turned to me and said, ‘when you can, always include someone who doesn’t normally get included from the team into a picture. Always share the spotlight,’ was the lesson from Coach White. “I learned that from Bobby Hull.” 1
Always share the spotlight.
I’ve always squinted bad in the sun. My mom used to call me One-eyed-Pete because I had the habit of closing one eye whenever she took pictures. Unfortunately, the bright lights movie-making demands haven’t helped my predilection for squinting.
I seemed to be at a genetic disadvantage to bright lights from the get go. So, Bobby Hull’s advice — whether it was true or not ( Jack had a way of telling stories like all good coaches with an ounce of fantastical in order to ger a bunch of teenagers to digest the principles behind them) was a game changer.
The next time I was asked for a photo, I looked around to practice what Jack had taught me. I didn’t see any stunt doubles, but I couldn’t miss who would end up being my best friend. Shaun Weiss was coming up the stairs just then. It wasn’t long before Shaun and I had everyone in stitches from telling jokes at our own expense as flash bulbs went off. Jack was right. It worked.
The spot light is bad enough when it’s on you, but it can be deadly when it goes away.
I recall a few years back in 2018 or so, Shaun was staying with me for a night, so he could get off the street and have a shower before going to his first business meeting in years. He had called me and I did a quick intake to make sure he wouldn’t die on my floor from a detox, and said yes. I never locked my door on my friend, even if I locked what little valuables I had away. To me, it was never to late.
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